One Way Your Family Can Feel More Connected

Original Post from Hola, My Dear (My Previous Website)

“Meaning hides in repetition: We do this every day or every week because it matters. We are connected by this thing we do together. We matter to one another. In the tapestry of childhood, what stands out is not the splashy, blow-out trip to Disneyland but the common threads that run throughout and repeat: the family dinners, nature walks, reading together at bedtime (with a hot water bottle at our feet on winter evenings), Saturday morning pancakes.”

— Kim John Payne

Mood Boards Filled with Anticipation

The mood board above includes experiences and books that have inspired Family Day in my home. Things like pancakes in the morning gathered around the table with candlelight. We’re currently enjoying the candle we purchased during our trip to Charleston. Sometimes before we rush off to the kitchen to make pancakes, William and I enjoy coffee in bed while Arabella and Abigail have some fruit.

Outdoor time is also a priority, and even more fun with the incredible 1000 Hours Outside tracker. We love taking walks in our neighborhood and on local adventures. Warmer weather gives us the opportunity to enjoy our yard more.

Occasionally, we have dessert before a meal on Family Day. For example, in the fall we gathered around the fire pit every Sunday for s’mores prior to lunch. It was so fun! The girls loved it and it made it feel like a day no one wanted to miss.

Backstory to Family Day in My Home

Fall 2022 marked the first time my family and I were intentional about selecting a day when the following things were put on hold: errands, house chores, and commitments to events/activities.

It started off with family night on Fridays. A couple months later we decided to carve out an entire day every week (Sunday to be exact) where our primary focus was time together. Time without normal, every day distractions. Think of it as a vacation mindset. One where you don’t have work or school; and if you already have a vacation planned, but receive an invite to something, it simply means you can’t make it.

Saying “No” to the Pressure

It can feel a little odd at first to do it on a weekly basis, but from my personal experience so far, a huge weight is lifted off my shoulders every Sunday. It affords us the opportunity to give ourselves a free pass. A free pass to what feels like immense pressure sometimes.

Family Day Isn’t Meant to Be Perfect

Aside from carving out a day with intention, Family Day can be whatever you envision it to be. And it’s not about it being perfect. Every week we learn something new. We also continue to do things we like and remove things that didn’t work before. Every week allows us to complete a “review” of sorts, which is something I learned by reading Jefferson Bethke’s book, Take Back Your Family; as well as the handbook that serves as an extension to the book — Take Back Your Family Handbook.

It doesn’t mean we can’t meet up with family and/or friends, but if we do, the intent behind it is to ensure we’re making togetherness and our mindsets a priority, while not overextending ourselves. We also make it a point to carve out one-on-one time, as well as individual time since Family Day doesn’t imply we need to be glued to each other all day.

Is this Possible for People Who are Single or Don’t Have Kids?

Of course. Whether it’s one night a week or a full day, give yourself permission to cultivate your dream day without chores, errands, and stressful commitments.

Simplify the Labels

I recently listened to a podcast by Kim John Payne about Family Night vs Family Movie Night. The episode was an incredible reminder that it doesn’t have to be perfect or complicated. Sometimes we may feel like every week must follow the same plans, but instead of calling it family movie night, for example, just call it family night. Seasons change, interests change, obstacles occur, but when the label behind it is simplified, then you can cultivate something that matters regardless of what it is.

Visualize Your Mood Board

I’m curious to know, if you had to create your own mood board, what would that look like? What type of experiences and meals would you include? Please feel free to comment below.

Until next time [God willing],

Sandy